I was paired up with Officer Burnett for a 10-hour shift.  I was really excited about it because I enjoy that sort of thing, but Ofc. Burnett told me up front that things might be kind of slow due to the incoming thunderstorm.

 Crime doesn’t sleep, but it also doesn’t want to get too wet.

The evening started out with Ofc. Burnett and I getting to know each other and him giving me a tour of the sector we’d be covering.  He and his partner patrol while waiting for urgent calls to come in via the onboard computer.  Speaking of which, times had really changed regarding technology.  Gone were the days when they used monochromatic screens and floppy disks.  Now they were using internet-connected systems with removable hard drives, dash cams, and geo-locators.  It was impressive to say the least.

Our first urgent call came in (called a “hotshot”), and we were off.  Lights and sirens allowed us to cut through traffic and neighborhoods so that we reached our destination in just a matter of minutes.  It was a domestic disturbance that turned out to be a non-event.  It would be the only time through the rest of the night when we used lights and sirens.  Turns out Ofc. Burnett was right…it was indeed a slow night due to the torrential rains.  We responded to only one more call and a traffic stop, and we spent the rest of the night patrolling and writing reports.

We did stop for “dinner” around 11pm, and we went to Denny’s–one of the few places to sit down and eat in Henry sector.  Ofc. Burnett, his partner, and I spent dinner reminiscing about the old days of 8-tracks, cassette tapes, huge microwaves, and the advent of cable tv.  We finished up patrol around 1:45am and went back to the substation where Ofc. Burnett dropped me off.

And then it got interesting…

I didn’t realize how exhausted I was until I got back in my truck to go home.  It’s amazing how much sitting in a car for 10 hours can take out of you.  Strangely, my warning light came on shortly after I left the substation and said “Low tire pressure”.  This is not uncommon, as my sensors frequently tell me when the tire pressure is a couple psi’s too low.  I figured I’d get air in the tires in the morning.

On my way home via the highway, I began to hear what sounded like an 18-wheeler using its air-brakes…only there was no traffic around me.  I turned off the radio to hear it better, but I still couldn’t tell what it was.  Suddenly I smelled burning rubber and realized

Crap, I have a flat!

I pulled off the highway onto the shoulder so I could inspect the damage… and damage I did see.  My tire was shredded!  I’ve never had that happen before.  If I hadn’t

smelled the rubber, I wouldn’t have known I had a flat.  Unfortunately, I couldn’t use my factory jack because the truck wasn’t exactly level on the ground.  I had to call roadside assistance and wait for an hour before they arrived.  Thankfully I had a full sized spare, and I was on my way home by 3:15am.  The fortuitous thing about all this is that I planned on getting new tires Saturday morning.  high five!

Lulu

two great families!  There was no question in anyone’s mind that Lulu would be adopted quickly due to her cute stature.  For larger dogs like Jack, however, the wait can be longer.  Many families want cute puppies and feel the larger or older dogs will be “too much work”.

I beg to differ.  While it’s true some dogs are set in their ways, I firmly believe most can be retrained with enough patience and consistency.  Jack is very smart, as I alluded to in my blog entry.  He picked up on my “heel” training during our run, so I can only imagine how smart he would be after weeks of consistent training.

Congratulations to the two families who gained some great additions to the family.  If only everyone would consider the shelter as a first stop when pet hunting.

Jack

Saturn

Meet Saturn.  Yes, that’s right….Saturn.  I don’t know who named her, but she’s a planetary princess for sure. I chose this sweet little lady as my running partner because of her sweet, calm disposition.  As I walked by her kennel, she just looked at me….longingly.  It was as if she wanted me to stop and talk to her.  So I did.

Immediately, she did what many of the APA! dogs do when they’re used to being in the kennels:  she pressed her body against the chain link fence to allow me to stick my fingers through and pet her. She didn’t bark, as many do because they’re excited someone’s there to see them.  She bowed her head to allow me to pet her.  How could I resist??

I decided we were going to run together and hooked the leash to her.  She was extremely excited, but this only manifested in her pulling….strongly.  As a terrier/pit bull mix, she was very stout, and it took all I had to keep her from pulling me forward.

We began our run similarly to all my others….she pulled strongly with boundless energy.  I had to keep reminding her to “heel”, and she eventually got it.  This is especially important for moments like waiting at a crosswalk.  After the first half-mile, we stopped for water and Saturn looked especially tired. I realized very quickly she was out of shape!  I’m very sensitive to the fitness level of the dogs I take out.  If they appear out of shape, I let them guide me the rest of the run.  When they want to run, I let them run.  When they want to walk or rest, I let them do it, and I stop frequently for water.

Saturn needed it.  She was so out of shape, that every time we passed a shady spot, she’d plop down and just hang out.  Our “run” took over an hour because of all the stops.  However this gave me an opportunity to see how she reacted to passers-by and other dogs.

Wow!  What a sweetie she was!

She was so gentle with people who came up to us and she was indifferent to dogs, birds, and squirrels.  A perfect walking companion.  We finished up our run with a special surprise; I allowed her to jump into the lake (shallow area, of course, and still on leash) to cool off.  She apparently really enjoyed this because she played like a 2 year old in the tub.  She swam and “bit” the water playfully.  It was very sweet.  We arrived back at the shelter, she entered her kennel, and she was once again sweet and calm.

Lulu

Looks like Rex has a sister-in-arms when it comes to grass rolling.  This is Lulu.  She’s a chihuahua/short coat mix.  I met her when I put Jack back in his kennel today after our run.  Lulu was so adorable, I couldn’t resist taking her out for a walk even though I was exhausted from my run.  She was just so gentle….and small.  I never was a “small dog” kind of person until I met a friend’s three rat terriers.  Little dogs are hilarious because they are so energetic and playful.

The adoption counselors warned that Lulu probably isn’t able to keep up in a jog, but that she should be well-suited for walking.  They lied.

Lulu practically pulled me the entire way.  I decided to call her bluff and start running with her.  She ran just fine for about a half mile until I made her stop so we could play in the grass for a bit.  Immediately, Lulu threw herself on her back with her feet folded in the air.  She rolled around like a crazy woman for about 5 minutes.  When she appeared done, we walked back toward the shelter.

We started to pass by a riding mower, as the local high school’s football field was being mowed.  I thought for sure Lulu would be frightened at such a large, loud machine.  Not only was she not frightened, but she actually pulled toward it as if to say…

I’m Lulu, damn it!”

For the remainder of the walk, she simply sniffed and alternated between running and walking.  She was extremely sweet and would make a great addition to any home.  Adopt this girl already!!

Jack

Guess who’s back!  That’s right, Jack, the heel nipper extraordinaire.  I wanted to go for a brisk run, and the pet adoption counselors are always grateful to get Jack some exercise.  He’s just so energetic and rambunctious if he thinks he’s going to get out of the kennel for a bit.  Whenever I say “I’m taking Jack out today”, the counselors usually respond with “Oh, thank you!  Thank you so much.”

Much like last time, Jack started out verrrrry excited.  He loves treats, so the counselor distracted him with a treat while I attached his “Adopt Me” vest.  We went on our way, and I could tell he was ready to run almost immediately.  Again, he attempted to “herd” me, but I nipped that in the bud by distracting him with the command to “Heel”.  As with last time, he was phenomenal on the trail.  He was much better about heeling on command, and he was not distracted by anything.

I did have a heart-stopping moment when I felt the leash fall loosely against my leg.  It literally felt like Jack was no longer attached and was making a break for it.  I immediately looked down in a panic and there was Jack right next to me.  He looked up at me with the expression…

What’s wrong with YOU, bro?”

Turns out the leash was loose because he did exactly what he was supposed to do and heeled right next to me while we ran.  Usually he’s either just in front or just behind and I try to remind him to heel.  This happened two more times, so I felt silly for panicking.  Each time, Jack looked at me like I was crazy.

When we got back to my truck to take pictures, Jack again looked at the open door quizzically because I wouldn’t allow him to jump in.

And guess what–today you get a two-fer!   Check out “I’m Lulu damn it!” to read about sweet, sweet Lulu.

Deena

Meet Deena.  Actually, Deena was the first dog I wanted to run with in the Jog-a-Dog program on my first day, but she was already out with someone.

I noticed on the program calendar that there was an entry for 7:30am on Wednesdays.  Curious, I emailed the coordinator and asked what this was about.  The coordinator (who is a runner) mentioned that if 3-4 people express an interest, he’ll show up so we can take the dogs out.  Now I don’t know where our lines got crossed, but I thought this would be a running group that would take several dogs out to run together and help socialize them.  I was wrong.  What this turned out to be was just me showing up at 7:30am to do my usual run.  Let’s just say….

I’m not a morning person.”

When I realized that’s what this was, I thought “Well shoot, I could have slept in a bit more.”  However, I figured I might as well go through with it since I was already there.  I took the opportunity to grab Deena now that she was available.  What originally drew me to her during my orientation was her sweet, gentle nature.  When people came to her kennel, she pressed her body against the fence so people could stick their fingers through and pet her.  She didn’t bark, and when you stuck your fingers through, she’d lick them.

Deena was a GREAT running partner and learned almost as quickly as Jack how to “heel” properly.  Although extremely curious about other dogs, she was not overly distracted by people or cyclists.  She didn’t seem particularly interested in water, and she certainly kept up with me the entire run.  Only twice did she put on the doggie breaks (see Betty); once to pee, and once to poop.  We finished our run with a full-on sprint, and Deena kept up the entire way!

Jack

Well hellooooo Jack!  This good looking young pup is a dynamo on the trail.  I really worried at first because he was so much more excitable than the other two dogs I took out for a run on the Jog-a-Dog program.  From the moment we left his kennel, he began taunting the other dogs as we passed their kennels as if to say “Ha ha, I’m going for a run and you’re staying here like an inmate!”  He pulled so tightly on the leash that I had to lean my body weight back to keep from falling forward.  When we got inside to attach his harness and “Adopt Me” vest, he began jumping and excitably gnawing on my hand.  It was clear he was ready to go.

He was herding me”

This crazy canine couldn’t wait to get on the trail and literally pulled me the first half mile.  He started nipping at my heels as we began to run, which is something I didn’t expect.  He’s a 56 lb border collie mix, so I realized he was herding me.  I worried this would happen on the entire run, but I gave him a chance to get his excitement out and settle into the run.  Sure enough he calmed down and just ran.

It took a bit of practice to get him to recognize the command “Heel”.  I wanted him to run alongside me and not ahead of me.  He had a tendency to run ahead and potentially trip me mid-stride.  Border collies are known for their intelligence, and living up to his breed, Jack caught on fairly quickly what I wanted when I said “Heel”.  He began to actually look me in the eyes as he ran alongside me, which I found particularly neat.  He was waiting for confirmation that what he was doing was correct and to see what I would say/do next.  Of course, I just praised him.

As I did with the other dogs, I stopped at each water station, but like Rex, he was only interested in water at the first station.  Jack just had a different “feel” than Betty.  He seemed to immediately trust me, whereas Betty reserved her decision to trust until a later date.  He was an incredibly good companion to run with, taking no interest in other dogs or joggers.  The passing cyclists caused Jack to stay close to my side, but as soon as they were gone he was fine.

As we finished our run, I felt we could sprint to the end because Jack had so much energy left.  In fact, he began to herd me again as we sprinted.  Since he was so excited at the beginning of our run, I decided there was no way I would be able to get any photos of him.  I waited until the end of our run.  As I opened the door to my truck to get my camera out, Jack assumed we were going for a ride, so he attempted to enter.  You can see the photo above as he kept looking at the open door confused about why I was holding him back.

He was a real pleasure to run with, and I know we’ll do it again soon.  Unless he gets adopted, which would be even better!

As I did with Betty, I stopped by my truck to get a few photos of Rex.  Unlike Betty, he didn’t try to hop into my truck the moment I opened the door to get my camera.  That may have been because I blocked him with my incredibly strong looking and intimidating body.  As I retrieved the camera from my bag, I wasn’t paying close attention to Rex, but I could feel some really hard tugging on the leash…as if it was getting shorter.  I turned with my camera ready to get shots and I see this “regal” little guy rolling around in the grass and dirt and getting completely tangled in his leash.

I laughed and knelt down to untangle him.  Once I got him untangled, I got no more than three photos of his face when he immediately laid back down and began rolling around in the grass and dirt again.  You crazy…..crazy….dog.

Once we got on the trail, Rex proved himself to be radically different from Betty.  For starters…

He pulled me!”

That’s right.  For the first mile, he ran in front of me as if to challenge my running prowess.  We stopped for our first water break and he drank a bit.  Then he was ready to get back on the trail.  This time he started to fall back to run alongside me and we continued this way until the second water break.  Believe it or not, he was not interested in water.  We continued on for the remaining 1.5 miles with Rex eventually falling behind a little.  He still kept the pace, though, to the point that I felt comfortable sprinting the last 1/2 mile.  Then we walked for a 1/2 mile to the shelter and sat under a tree for about 5 mins.  He took the opportunity to roll around in the dirt again and get tangled in his leash.

Unlike Betty, Rex didn’t plop down on the cold floor of the shelter office.  Instead he sought some light petting from an adopter who was filling out some paperwork.  I’m really looking forward to running with him again.  I may even take him on a 4 mile run….and then roll around in the dirt with him.

Betty (before run)

Meet Betty.  I wish I could say she’s my newest pet companion, but instead, I’ll say she’s one of MANY amazing dogs at Austin Pets Alive! (APA) that is part of the Jog-A-Dog program.  APA is a non-profit facility whose goal is to make Austin a 90% no-kill city.  APA takes in animals from the Austin Animal Shelter (city pound) when they are on the list to be euthanized and tries to rehome them.

Austin Pets Alive!

This organization is near and dear to my heart because of their no-kill mission, which is why I intend to volunteer there regularly.  They instituted the jog-a-dog program to allow volunteers (like me, yay!) to take the dogs on walks and runs along Town Lake.  It’s brilliant if you ask me.  The dogs get regular exercise, they’re less stressed at the shelter, and they’re calmer because they’re physically worked.

A little about Betty

Betty (before run)

Betty is a 2-year old Staffordshire Bull Terrier mix who weighs about 50 lbs.  She was the only dog listed on the “Jog” category, although the other dogs are capable.  She was very excited to go out for a run, so I was pretty enthused with her.  I stopped by my truck to snap these shots of her, although she wouldn’t stop coming up to try to lick my face.  Therefore one of the shots was slightly out of focus.

She was extremely well behaved on the leash and despite her size, she didn’t pull me much.  I noticed however that after only one mile, she began to lag behind.  The rest of the run turned into me pulling a 50 lb weight behind me.  A half-mile into that first mile, Betty put the brakes on by stiffening all four paws like Fred Flintstone stopping a car.  I figured she had to go to the bathroom, but instead she just looked at me like “See?  I knew I could boss you around.”

…looked like I was dragging a dark chocolate ham hock”

So it was on.  I said as excitedly as I could “Okay Betty, let’s go!!”  She let out a big sigh and reluctantly ran again.  This four-paw braking method happened two more times throughout the run, but I was hip to her ways.  We stopped every half-mile to drink some water and I wet her down to cool her off.  She never let the distractions get the best of her and she stayed with me the whole time.  I decided to walk the last half-mile with her down the bridge descension (walkway shaped like circular stairs).  Halfway down, Betty just said “I’m done” and plopped her whole body spread-eagle on the walkway.  I waited….and waited….and waited.  She just laid there panting, but not overly so.  I wanted to get going again, so I said “Let’s go Betty!” and gave the leash a tug.

If you can picture it, this repeated tugging looked like I was dragging a dark chocolate covered ham hock across the walkway.  Betty didn’t budge; legs still sprawled out.  I had to physically pick her body up to get her to run again.  At first I worried I was asking too much of her, but after she kept up with me the rest of the way it was clear she is a mistress of manipulation.  She had all the energy in the world to chase after squirrels, but you ask her to run the remaining half-mile, she says “Yeah…about that.  I’m really tired.”

Betty (after run--can barely keep her eyes open)

But this manipulation worked and I took it easy on her the rest of the way to the shelter.  We finished our day together with an after run picture.  As we went inside the air conditioned office where I drop off the leash, Betty immediately took advantage of the cold floor and spread herself out like spilled ink.  Until next time, Betty Loo!

Is your beard cold?

The Beard Cap

First of all, what…is…this???  I can’t tell if it’s to keep your beard warm or to allow you to pretend you’re a viking who’s on shore leave.  And why does the model appear as though he’s plotting to hide in your closet this evening for when you go to bed?  I mean, he’s gritting his teeth!  Either way….no.

Sperm Shoes

I can see it now…conference room full of suits debating about the logo that will represent the company’s flagship product.

Sperm Shoes

“Nike has an iconic logo that has come to represent our brand.  We need something like that!

“Yes, you’re right!  It has to be perfect.  But what?”

“I vote for a spermatazoa.”

“That’s it!  You’re a genius.  Let’s run with it.  See you all back here tomorrow to discuss our plan to monetize this new logo.”

The point of these shoes is that they’re “gravity defying” as pointed out in the write-up.  So….what’s the tie-in?

Space Helmet (for reading)

Space Helmet (for Reading)

Ahh yes, last but not least…the Space Helmet (for reading).  Presumably, this records your thoughts and saves them for later review.  Why?  The overlords demand it.

Imagine this guy’s wife?  I ask because I have it on good faith that he wears this to bed too.  And why is he trying to act normal while wearing it.  WE know he feels ridiculous…you can see it in his eyes!  Let it out, bro…we’ll support you.